March 7, 2010
An Ode to the Worst
The worst I ever had/ like a gun with no bang/ Fourth of July with no fireworks/ you’re minus the snap crackle and the pop/ A flat soda no fizz/ a flame with no spark/ A blow pop without the gum/ a tootsie roll that never gets to the center/ You're a paddle with no stroke/ a motor boat with no gas/ In the end you’re an everlasting gobstopper that doesn't last/ You’re a parade with one float/ a balloon with no pop/ for all of the best there are surly some worst/ you’re the worst I’ve ever had/
You’re a dried up lake/ a sunken ship/ a flower that never bloomed/ you’re an un-built house/ a house that never became a home/
You’re a snow slope with no snow/ you’re a Benz sitting on bricks/ you’re a piano with no keys/ you’re a limited cell phone plan/
Surely you must understand you’re the worst I’ve ever had/
You’re a baseball game with no home runs/ a football game with no touch downs/ a basketball game with no slam dunk/ a hockey game no goals/ you’re the losing team/ a defeated player/ you’re the man down/ the lost battle/worse the lost war/
You’re a HOT ASS MESS/
I must confess you’re the worst I’ve ever had/
You’re a Batman with no Robin/ A Super man less the Super/ you’re the Green Lantern with a burnt out bulb/ the Incredible Hulk without much incredibility/
You are the underdog/ you’re Wiley Coyote in every episode/ you’re the Elmer Fudd of life/ you’re Pinky without the Brain
You’re the best of the worst/ ahead as the last/ you’re #1 if we start from the end/ you’re bringing up the rear/ face it you’re just an ass/
You’re a King none the less/ with no Kingdom/ no Crown and no Glory/
You truly are the worst I’ve ever had!
2 comments:
You are "Wyle coyote in every episode", the "best of the worst" "benz sitting on bricks" that's good stuff. It really does speak to wasted potential. Ouch. Love your writing. You really do make someone feel like they are a Superbowl with no commercials. A year with no summer, a Joe biden without Barack. You make a man feel like "he's just there."
Sorry I am so late responding, thank you for gracing me with your time...
Its much appreciated... I hope I can give you more... and hope I can make a man feel like every days a football sunday woman come with a mute and they'd never have to get up for a cold beer... besitos
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